Its hard when we see a friend/loved one fall after we have tried to help them up. Its so much easier to walk away and be discouraged. What we must realize is that what we do to help anyone shouldn’t be for our reward or the promise that “they will do better.” That is a selfish reason to help. If we chose to help we should do that regardless of what the person does or does not do with the help. People want immediate satisfaction with EVERYTHING. We want our actions to take immediate effect and change the world in that instant. We stop giving money to a person who is homeless because we “don’t want him to do something wrong with the money.” We want them to make great choices with the $2 we could spare. Guess what…not our job to police others. We don’t know what a person is going through, has been through, or if they will even be alive the next day… We don’t want to be “fooled” by someone who is really just faking having an issue. But that is what makes us fools.
To allow others to stop us from being kind, stop us from helping WHEN and HOW we can simply because they didn’t change right away or “didn’t really need the help” is the true atrocity. First we must think we are a God if our one action or even 5 should change a person at that moment. Imagine crawling for 5 years, someone helps you up to walk, you walk but fall down again. Help them up 5 – 6 more times…but their legs and balance aren’t there yet. That doesn’t mean stand there and just hold them up because there again…their own legs will not become strong. But realize, when they are ready to walk…when they want to – they will remember when you did try and help and they will cling to whatever they can to stand on their own. Your action today may not be remembered or even make a true difference in their lives until years later. I know ths to be true because I have had people help me along the way and it wasn’t until later that I realized how amazing it was.
So basically – yes use common sense but don’t lose heart. Don’t expect immediate results from your assistance – people take time to change. Do what you do because that is who YOU are not because of who they are not. Remember that love means you will do whatever you can for a person even if that means walking away so they can stand on their own if they chose. Their success or failure is not a reflection on the help we gave or tried to give. Yes do realize that what you do today – even if it is just so simple – can make a difference 10 or 20 years from now. Help is not to give us immediate satisfaction – it is what makes us truly spiritual beings and not just bitter humans.