From Girl to Warrior – Introduction

My name is Angela Bollinger and I am a warrior.  Anyone that knows me knows that I am not aggressive but I am a fighter.  I am not one that hides much – not because I am proud or boastful, but because I have a desire to use anything I have experienced to help other people – to help them not to feel alone in their struggles.  Most of the people I come across are women because many of our issues are very similar – to the point we similarly don’t tell others about our true issues, experiences, and pain.   With that we also don’t tell our true triumphs!   We have been told to be humble and keep certain things to ourselves – translated – “don’t be proud of your accomplishments or abilities in front of others and if you have a problem – you should be embarrassed until you get over it yourself.”  Is it any wonder then that mental illness, suicide, obesity, general depression is constantly on the rise?

So far it sounds like a “bitch session” on my part – but it is exactly the opposite.  My purpose here is to help young girls and women find their confidence – their true beauty – and to be unashamed.  Confidence will help a woman to rise above any situation and to know that she can do anything she puts her mind to.  Beauty is what a woman is – period.  From runway model to the mother of eight children – she is beautiful.  Unashamed women are not ones that have no “baggage” or mistakes – but the ones that own those issues and own the responsibility to change them.  I am going to open up myself – my past – my mistakes to you.  The same “stories” that I have told many women along the way in my life that have benefited them in some way I will share here.

Now I will really introduce myself…

Me in 6th grade

Here I am in the 6th grade – Angela Poole.  I was wearing the Coca-Cola shirt that my aunt Sue had purchased for me.  She had taken me shopping one day in what I considered a very “fancy” store.  I had my hair cut up the street by a woman who still had the same haircut from the 60’s (it was the 80’s at this point).  I really wanted that “80’s” look.  I hoped it would detract from my teeth and that others could see that I was pretty.   I sat down to have my picture taken and I was for that minute very confident – because Sue bought me the shirt.  She was beautiful – brilliant red hair, small dainty hands, loving and she poured affection onto me.  She drove a brand new, bright navy blue Firebird.  So I felt if she thought I was pretty – then I had to be.  After the picture I saw again that I wasn’t that pretty – and others pointed it out as well….fast forward (and if you read it fast it really makes it more dramatic… Sue killed herself, my dad drank more, I got pregnant at 17 and had a wonderful little girl, had a nervous breakdown at 22 after an abusive marriage, I was a cheater, liar, was severely depressed, soon became a stripper, then found a great job, a great friend who didn’t like that I was practicing Wicca but loved me, went through many more bad relationships including a crack-head, was still very sick with a severe anxiety based OCD, stopped partying, worked out, got better, met the love of my life, had another baby, started taking medicine for my post-partum depression and felt like myself again, rescued lots of animals, worked in different businesses, have my own businesses and love my life and myself…whew!  And that is just the very short story – can anyone relate?  Guess What I’m going to dissect my life – piece by piece and you can take from it what you will because you are not alone…

And here I am now…

Angela

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